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Courtship is the act and period of seeking the romantic love of an exclusive opposite sex with the intent to marry, yet consciously restrained by their unmarried status.
* <Ge 2:18>: The Lord God said, “It is not good for the man to be alone. I will make a helper suitable for him.”
* Nothing missing in man’s own Constitution that he needs a partner to be wholesome.
* <1 Cor 7:1>: “It is good for a man not to have sexual relations with a woman.”
* <1 Cor 7:32>: I would like you to be free from concern. An unmarried man is concerned about the Lord’s affairs—how he can please the Lord.
But why was it not good for Adam to be alone?
* He lacks a helper to help him with accomplishing two godly purposes.
(1) To fulfill the Creator’s mandate for humanity to multiply and have dominion over the earth.
(2) To exemplify the image of God to have a peer with whom he can relate with or to love.
* <Ge 2:21>: So the Lord God caused the man to fall into a deep sleep; and while he was sleeping, he took one of the man’s ribs (or part of the man’s side) and then closed up the place with flesh.
* Woman to be equal with Man, yet she is to be loved and cared for by Man.
* Yet, man and woman possess a role of headship and subordination respectively.
* Courtship is for us to test what kind of relationship will lead up to marriage.
* Courtship is also for us to test whether that person honor an exclusive relationship.
* <Ge 2:22-23>: 22 Then the Lord God made a woman from the rib he had taken out of the man, and he brought her to the man. 23 The man said, “This is now bone of my bones and flesh of my flesh; she shall be called ‘woman,’ for she was taken out of man.”
* Importance of chastity and modesty of a woman.
<Ge 24:62-65> 62 Now Isaac had come from Beer Lahai Roi, for he was living in the Negev. 63 He went out to the field one evening to meditate, and as he looked up, he saw camels approaching. 64 Rebekah also looked up and saw Isaac. She got down from her camel 65 and asked the servant, “Who is that man in the field coming to meet us?” “He is my master,” the servant answered. So she took her veil and covered herself.
Clarity in considering someone for courtship*
1) Sympathizing Vs Liking someone
2) Admiring Vs Liking someone
3) Wanting a relationship to work Vs Truly enjoying that relationship
4) The perfect one Vs God prepared one
Love at first sight?
“I don’t believe in love at first sight. I think it’s a grave mistake. You’re attracted by physical characteristics, and you will regret it” ~ Lee Kuan Yew
* <Pro 31:30>: Charm is deceptive, and beauty is fleeting; but a woman who fears the Lord is to be praised.
* Beauty is in the eyes of the beholder.
Beware of tell-tale signs that pose as warnings*
1) Sexual immorality
* <1 Cor 6:18-20>: “18 Flee from sexual immorality. All other sins a person commits are outside the body, but whoever sins sexually, sins against their own body. 19 Do you not know that your bodies are temples of the Holy Spirit, who is in you, whom you have received from God? You are not your own; 20 you were bought at a price. Therefore honor God with your bodies.
2) Excessive pride
3) Mismanagement in work and finance
* <Ge 2:15>: The Lord God took the man and put him in the Garden of Eden to work it and take care of it.
4) Faith in Christ is still of utmost importance.
<2 Cor 6:14>: “Do not be yoked together with unbelievers. For what do righteousness and wickedness have in common? Or what fellowship can light have with darkness?”
On using Dating App
* YouGov Survey: Dating app used by only 24% of Singaporeans, with only 36% being Gen Z.
* People are actually beginning to lose confidence in the dating pool.
* Dating app removes all the natural difficulties leading to courtship, and conveniently produces a match up. Is it good?
* Important to learn about meaningful engagement with opposite sex leading up to courtship.
* Learn to build genuine connections from scratch, and let God leads our heart to be captivated by someone suitable.
* Courtship is meaningful when we are led to find the right person, at the right time, at the right place.
* Algorithm may not be the best way to determine compatibility.
Reflection
1. Why do you think single people are getting into courtship easily nowadays?
2. What to you is the modesty and chastity before marriage?
3. Do you believe in “love at first sight?” Why and why not?
4. Would you consider using dating app to find a partner? Why and why not? (Not applicable for married personnel).[/vc_column_text][/vc_column][/vc_row]
