Universal Longing for Marriage and Its Challenges
Universal longing for love and marriage is often contrasted with anxieties about marital failure. The gospel remains neutral towards marital status, affirming that neither marriage nor singleness holds inherent superiority or holiness. Throughout history and even in the present day, sexual immorality has been prevalent.
1 Corinthians 7:1-16: Context and Paul’s Response
In 1 Corinthians 7:1-16, Paul responds to a letter from the Corinthians advocating for abstinence from sexual relations. The Corinthians exhibited extremes: previous instances of incest and prostitution contrasted with their current legalistic abstinence. Paul counters this by affirming that marital relations are permissible to combat sexual immorality. He highlights mutual marital duty, permitting temporary abstinence only for prayer and emphasizing its non-permanence. He also distinguishes between biblical concessions and commands.
Celibacy, Marriage, and God’s Gifts
Paul presents celibacy as a gift, not a requirement for all Christians. He acknowledges that marriage is a better alternative for those struggling with uncontrolled passions. The Lord commands against separation between a wife and husband. Paul also shares his personal opinion on marriage with unbelievers, encouraging Christians to remain with their unbelieving spouses. He explains that not divorcing an unbeliever has spiritual benefits, including sanctification and the status of children. However, if an unbeliever departs, the Christian is not bound in such circumstances.
Addressing Asceticism and Legalism
Paul strongly opposes asceticism and legalism, arguing against abstinence from proper physical desires. He addresses concerns from Corinthian believers regarding marriage with unbelievers and emphasizes that God disapproves of both indulgence and asceticism. He warns against pride in celibacy.
Marriage as a Safeguard Against Immorality
Marriage serves as a safeguard against immorality, preventing involvement in prostitution, pornography, and extramarital affairs. However, Paul clarifies that marriage is not solely for sex but does provide protection against temptation. Nevertheless, marriage does not guarantee immunity from sexual sins; sanctification still requires reliance on the Holy Spirit.
Mutual Submission and Love in Marriage
Paul critiques legalism and asceticism, advocating for mutual marital duty and submission. He emphasizes mutual love, consideration, and submission in all aspects of marriage, not just sex. A healthy marital relationship requires other-orientedness and avoiding self-centeredness. He warns against misusing biblical verses for self-interest and stresses the importance of mutual love and consideration. The deeper message is fostering a loving marital relationship while avoiding the misuse of scripture to justify sexual immorality.
Marriage and Singleness: Neither a Stigma
Both marriage and singleness are legitimate options, neither carrying a stigma. The focus should be on serving and glorifying God regardless of marital status. Self-worth and happiness are not dependent on marriage but on God. However, singleness is cautioned against for those lacking self-control.
Divorce and Separation: God’s Perspective
Society often accepts divorce, but God hates it. Both separation and divorce are forbidden by God, as marriage is a lifelong commitment. Entering into a serious relationship requires careful consideration. Instead of blaming God for marital difficulties, individuals should engage in self-reflection. Consulting God in marriage decisions is crucial, as prioritizing personal desires can be dangerous. Christians facing divorce are advised to approach it with humility, prayer, repentance, and a desire for reconciliation. Even for those who prayed before marriage, divorce should not be the easy way out. God’s purpose for marriage extends beyond sex and procreation, emphasizing sanctification. However, in cases such as domestic violence, temporary separation may be necessary.
Christian-Christian vs. Christian-Unbeliever Couples
The approach to divorce and separation differs between Christian-Christian and Christian-unbeliever couples. Christian-Christian couples are instructed against divorce and encouraged to strive to salvage the marriage. Self-reflection questions for couples considering divorce include evaluating efforts made to salvage the relationship and understanding the root causes of conflict. Self-reflection and forgiveness are vital, even when one has been wronged. God’s example of relentless love and forgiveness serves as a model for marital relationships. Even if reconciliation efforts fail, striving to preserve the marriage should remain the priority.
For Christian-unbeliever couples, Paul provides guidance within the context of a previously non-Christian couple where one spouse converts. The Christian spouse should not initiate divorce, but if the unbelieving spouse chooses to leave, it is permissible. The reason for not divorcing an unbeliever is the potential gospel influence on the spouse and children. Paul calls for peace and harmony in such marriages, urging sincere reconciliation efforts before allowing the unbelieving spouse to depart.
Conclusion: Key Takeaways
In conclusion, key takeaways include the holiness of marriage and sex, the permanence of marriage, and the equal value of marriage and singleness. The ultimate focus should be on glorifying God through one’s life, regardless of marital status.